The Fine Art of Cunnilingus

woman-orgasmWhen you’re learning to become a sex god, one of the hardest things to figure out is how to make a girl have an orgasm.

For some reason, nature saw it fit to make a woman take much longer to be aroused and much longer to finish than a man, so a lot of the time as men, we’re left struggling to hold back throughout much of the sexual encounter, waiting for her to reach her climax.

As you might have noticed, getting a woman to have an orgasm by just using your penis alone can seem like searching for a unicorn at the end of a rainbow. If you fail in this endeavor, it’s not always your fault, either, as many women can’t even get themselves to orgasm through vaginal insertion alone, and have to play with their external parts (called the “vulva” collectively, but often incorrectly referred to as part of the vagina) or resort to using fancy toys that can do much more than a standard penis.

Some women have a hard time having orgasms even with the addition of these enhancements. It comes down to the fact that women have much lower testosterone than us, and testosterone is very strongly tied to desire and ability to climax. It doesn’t help things, either, than a woman’s most sensitive sexual parts aren’t inside her vagina at all.

Not all is lost, however.

By learning the fine art of cunnilingus—that is, learning how to pleasure a woman’s entire sexual landscape using your mouth—you can more than likely coax an orgasm out even the most more tense of partners. Just as it’s hard to mess up a blow job, it’s hard to get cunnilingus completely wrong, and you’ll find that it’s actually a rather intuitive process.

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Cunnilingus is a useful skill that can certainly be learned and perfected with your own style. It’s a great trick to have in your toolbox that your partner is sure to appreciate; you might find yourself using it in quite a few situations one you get the hang of it, for example:

As Foreplay

Part of getting a woman to climax is getting her in the mood to begin with. Unfortunately, unlike a man, she is not nearly instantly aroused and ready when the moment calls. If she wasn’t “ready” when you started, she is unlikely to be able to have an orgasm. In other words, causing a woman to have a sexual climax is a long process that starts even before you’re having sex. If you start to abruptly, this can sabotage you from the beginning.

Cunnilingus is a great way to get your woman initially aroused. Those subtle feelings of being touched will signal to her body that she should prepare her vagina for sex. You want to give some time for the blood to rush to that area before you start anything rough.

As After-play

Let’s face it, a lot of the time you’re going to blow your load before she climaxes, and you may not always be ready to go again immediately. In times like these, you can finish her off by employing some expert cunnilingus skills. Does this deviate from the ideal narrative of making her orgasm purely with your thrusts of passion? Sure. But we have to be realistic here, and we’re not always going to be able to do that.

So, how do you deliver quality cunnilingus that will make her shiver and scream? How do you get her addicted to your tongue so that she keeps coming back for more?

Well, learning how to please a woman with your mouth is like any other action-based skill—it takes practice—but there are some tips you can learn that will lead you in the right direction. Just make sure to stay open minded because every woman is different, and they all have their “sweet spots” just like anybody else. Overall, keep these principles in mind:

 

1) Become a feedback machine.

First of all, to be able to perform well in the bedroom in any capacity, you have to listen to your partner’s responses. Unless she’s one of those manipulative women who fakes pleasure and orgasm, pay close attention to what makes her writhe and moan. Remember the things that she seems to like more and tease those areas more often, and steer clear of times where she seemed to recoil or act uncomfortable, even if you found the act of touching her there to be a turn-on.

 

2) Know where the clitoris is.

Believe it or not, a lot of women themselves don’t even know where it is. It’s not some mythical creature, though, and it can be found at the apex where her two inner vagina lips meet, near the top of the vulva.

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This may not sound very attractive, but it is basically a tiny penis and is made of the same kind of tissue as the head of your manhood; this will help you understand the kind of sensitivity you’re dealing with. It is very small, however, so in some women you may not even be able to see it directly, and may only be able to view the hood of the clitoris (the foreskin, essentially). In terms of giving your woman pleasure, the clitoris is the crown jewel of the vulva, so don’t neglect it, but also be careful not to work it so hard.

If you look closely and find that the tip of your partner’s clitoris has emerged from its protective hood while you are giving her cunnilingus, this is a good sign. This means that she is aroused and that you are doing something right. Look for this as well as vaginal secretions to get a feel for whether you’re on the right track.

 

3) Incorporate all of her genitals.

Women have more than just a hole; that’s the first thing you must learn if you are new to cunnilingus. When it comes to pleasing a woman with your mouth, you are going to have to dive into everything—every fold, every nook, every piece of flesh—so you can’t be afraid to try things on what might be new territory for you. Try stimulating her inner lips, her outer lips, the hood of her clitoris, as well as the inside of her hole with your tongue. See how she responds. Be enthusiastic about it.

 

4) Start slow.

A woman’s arousal period can be slow-going, so start by gingerly touching and licking her vulva and slowly work it harder as she becomes more aroused.

 

5) Don’t just lick.

In the same way that a blow job is a lot more pleasurable if you partner gets creative and varies the stimulation, you should do the same when you’re performing cunnilingus.

make-her-beg-for-moreBy all means, lick her folds and tease her with your tongue, but touching her with your fingers as well and even sucking on her clitoris or vagina lips when she’s very aroused will probably lead her towards orgasm.

 

As you can see, cunnilingus doesn’t have to be hard. It just takes some practice and some consideration for these basic principles and tips. Good luck!